Choose Your Own Adventurers #2: Captain Paradox Zeeman

“Let’s all paint Adventurers!” cried sho3box. “I have almost all thirty-two of those rare expensive miniatures!”

“Yeah!” axiom responded. “I have all of that overly-fetishised and as such difficult-to-collect range.”

“Yay!” Curis said, getting caught up in the enthusiasm of the group project. “I have … er … maybe … one?  But I’ll do a cool retro-mimic logo!”


To reiterate from axiom’s post, our rules are:

  1. Paint a Rogue Trader Adventurer
  2. Valid miniatures are ones marketed as “Adventurer” in a Mail Order flier, Citadel catalogue or White Dwarf
  3. Let the other two bloggers have a turn, then paint another miniature.

As I had practically no Adventurers, sho3box generously jump-started my collection with the donation of a Pirate Captain.

Teenage-era sho3box had modified the Captain by adding an uzi-style magazine to the pistol and a pouch to the thigh.  He’d also removed the sword, as the lumpen sculpting and lead’s tendency to droop made it “look like a floppy dildo”.  This did give me the opportunity to do some conversion work to ham up the pirate angle – a hook hand.

Sparce Pirate Captain with paperclip claws

The first attempt at a replacement was a “split hook” prostheses, made from two paperclips filed to points and bent into curves.  It didn’t sit well with the chunky 1980s sculpting, so I added a big goofy Lego claw.

“Hello.  I like money.”

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The other pirate cliche I went with was stripey trews.  Disappointingly I realised after I’d painted Zeeman that the Studio paintjob also had stripey trews, so I wasn’t doing anything new or edgy.

A lot of the early Rogue Trader figures incorporate anachronistic fantasy elements (either as a deliberate juxtaposition with the science fiction setting, or sculptors falling back on their established bags of tricks) – leather pouches, medieval boots, landsknecht sleeves, et cetera.  It’s interesting that the Pirate Captain’s boots are anachronistic, but aren’t the cliché thigh-high pirate boots of your 17th Century Caribbean pirate; no no no, instead, they’re boring ankle-high medieval boots.  Makes me wonder if he was sculpted as a generic 40K guy and later designated a pirate.  But anyway, to get the boots away from the medieval leather look I painted them gleaming ice-white, imagining Paradox Zeeman as a space-chav displaying his wealth with immaculate footwear.  (I may have also been thinking of the glorious Spacego cover.)


“Oi, innit blud.  Hit the legs, this is well waffle.”

I am thinking about adding freehand insignia to the back of his jacket, possibly the Crab Claw Nebula symbol.  It’d tie in nicely with his claw.  But that’s a finishing touch for another day, when I’ve collected the other Space Pirates in the range and rounded them out to a little trio/squad/army/formation/Apocalypse detachment.

“Feds have landed up, wiv me in charge. You’re merked.”

Next up in Choose Your Own Adventurers – sho3box!

If you missed it, axiom’s excellent first episode is here!

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18 thoughts on “Choose Your Own Adventurers #2: Captain Paradox Zeeman

  1. Brilliant! He’s a bonkers sculpt, elevated into further nonsense by the newly added bionic claw (which ramps up level of piraticality several notches).

    The white and purple combo reminds me of disco. What better look for a space pirate?!

  2. The gangsta look really worked out so well, its going to be difficult to see that sculpt any other way now. Definitive work.

    I imagine that the “fur” on that waistcoat has all of the lustre and panache of a 1980s elasticated car seat cover.

    Its an extra kick to see the autopistol mag and trouser pouch painted twenty years later :)

    Fab work Curis!

    1. Thanks! I do believe this figure has the honour of being the first figure I’ve acquired from you that’s appeared painted on the blog too.

      Reckon it’s an autopistol then? The 1991 Blue Catalogue identified it as a laspistol.

    1. Ha! One of the original aims of this project, for me, was to paint a selection of figures without having to make them into a squad or army. I’ve been trying to de-programme myself from the insidious marketing of miniatures companies that tell you can’t have a collection of dozens figures you like, it must be hundreds of figures organised into armies. But I must admit, a game-legal squad using the other pirates in the range and maybe some Ironclaw bods would be a treat.

  3. Oh! Nicely done! Those adventurers are among my favorite miniatures. They’re a little part of my own wargaming origins. Cheetor mentioned your blog on his most recent post and I feel I will not be disappointed. You do good work. I very much look forward to seeing the path you choose through this adventure. :)

    1. Thanks David! They were before my time, I only got to see a selection of the range that made it into Citadel Catalogue 1 back in 1991.

  4. That claw works so damn well. He looks every inch the greasy merc, ready to assure all and sundry that it’s nothing personal, then taking his loot to buy himself the most tasteless gear available, as long as it’s well pricey. Except the claw. That claw is all function, no frills. I bet it has a name.

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